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Michael T Smith's avatar

The day my wife and son go to church

And I stay behind

Although yesterday I spoke something

As I write, I become unraveled

And I stay behind

When I was younger I would draw pictures

As I write, I become unraveled

I couldn’t have known how fast it would go

When I was younger I would draw pictures

And anyway I still draw, well paint

I couldn’t have known how fast it would go

I had a dream that God told me to stop

And anyway I still draw, well paint

Although yesterday I spoke something

I had a dream that God told me to stop

The day my wife and son go to church

Karen Ehrens's avatar

This came together so well, and so deep. Keep painting with color and words.

Michael T Smith's avatar

Thank you, Karen. I will!

Nancy R Heisey's avatar

Writing a pantoum on Sunday has its own rhythms!

Rebecca Stultz's avatar

Don't stop writing, drawing, or painting. The God/Jesus I know wants to see and hear your thoughts and feelings.

Lisa Sjostrom's avatar

Please don't stop, no matter what G*d tells you! Very evocative, especially with your wife and son at church and your staying behind... Love this and thank you, Michael.

~Lisa in VT

Nicola Grove's avatar

me too, none of us knows how fast it will go..ravel yourself back

PAT's avatar

Very thought provoking!!!!!

Paul Brassard's avatar

Michael, this is so good. You have captured brilliantly, I think, that universal conflict of God, no God. God-fearing family man vs. what? A non-believer? A pantoum for us all.

Michael T Smith's avatar

Wow, thank you for saying that Paul.

Dora Odarenko's avatar

I love your last five or six lines! They pull the whole poem together! Dora Odarenko

Mark Gerow's avatar

1. today there is a kind of withdrawing cold that lingers in your fingers around the warm mug of relief

2. and I become stuck in an addictive loop of coffee refills and good intentions to write

3. although yesterday there was space for sunshine and warmth that caused me to move and undulate

4. as I write I feel a contraction of muscle and resistance to the very thing that brings me levity

2. and I become stuck in an addictive loop of coffee refills and good intentions to write

5. when I was younger I rarely resisted the cold and off-putting weather, lunging with galloshes and innocence

4. as I write I feel a contraction of muscle and resistance to the very thing that brings me levity

6. I couldn’t have known that weather could bring one into a depressive, motionless, uninspired state

5. when I was younger I rarely resisted the cold and off-putting weather, lunging with galloshes and innocence

7. and anyway, who would have told me that, with any good sense about them.

6. I couldn’t have known that weather could bring one into a depressive, motionless, uninspired state

8. I had a dream that tidal waves were ready to destroy all I knew after bombs had landed in oceans abroad

7. and anyway, who would have told me that, with any good sense about them.

3. althought yesterday there was space for sunshine and warmth that caused me to move and undulate

8. I had a dream that tidal waves were ready to destroy all I knew after bombs had landed in oceans abroad

1. today there is a kind of withdrawing cold that lingers in your fingers around the warm mug of relief

Adam Lauver's avatar

Today is the day my friends leave

and I think I'll miss them when they're gone

although yesterday I wasn't so sure.

As I write, I wonder about friends

and I think I'll miss them when they're gone.

When I was younger I wanted them to miss me.

As I wrote, I'd wonder about friends:

I couldn’t have known how much I'd miss

when I was younger. I wanted to be missed,

and anyway, is every missing a lack?

I couldn’t have known how much I'd miss.

I had a dream I was stuck, waving at the gate

and anyway, is every missing a lack?

Tomorrow I may not be so sure.

In this one I'm stuck again, waving at the gate.

Today is the day I leave.

Frances Moore's avatar

Today, a guest in my house

And I am in a spell

Although yesterday holds me too

I hear myself attend

And I am in a spell

Younger, attention magnified

I hear my attention attend

I couldn't have known its gift

Younger, attention magnified

And anyway time is a dress

I couldn't have known its gift

In a dream of presence

And anyway time is a dress

Although yesterday holds me too

In a dream of presence

Today, a guest in my house.

I look forward very much to hearing you speak with Olivia in Borris.😊

Nicola Grove's avatar

I wasn't sure how to read this.. a guest in your own house, or a guest you were hosting... I love the dream of presence...

Karen Ehrens's avatar

These lines add up to more than the sum of the numbering! I love the waving at the gate line.

Deacon Joanne's avatar

Adam, I love the way the pantoum comes together and the musing behind it. Am I the only one who enjoys imaging people saying how much they will miss me at my funeral?

Marcia Campbell's avatar

Total surprise when you went from "my friends leave" in the first line to "I leave" in the last line. Wow!

Nicola Grove's avatar

I have been thinking about friends I don't seem to have time for any more, and this speaks to me...is every missing a lack? Mike Rosen has a wonderful poem about how people walk with you for a time and then leave you, or you leave them and you try to hold it lightly

Beth Cross's avatar

This works so well. You've really caught something

Paul Brassard's avatar

Nice, Adam. Your pantoum made me think about Willy Loman and how we all want to be "well liked" in the end. I think the questioning here is something we all do. We can never know anyone else's true feelings, even the people we are closest with. When our daughter was four (she just turned 50... Yikes!) she was on her bed in a time out for lying. We knew we were in trouble when she said, "You can't know if I'm lying, you're not inside my head!"

Lisa Marie Simmons's avatar

“...is every missing a lack?” Wonderful pondering!

Jae J Casella's avatar

Today is my new name's birthday

and I don’t need a chocolate cake.

Although yesterday I craved sweet words

as I write, I think about the departed, about…

And I don’t need a chocolate cake.

When I was younger, I was younger and

as I write about the departed, about how

I couldn’t have known the unknown.

When I was younger, I was younger and,

anyway, who cares about names?

I couldn’t have known the unknown.

I had a dream that I knew it all.

And anyway, who cares about names?

Although yesterday I craved sweet words,

I had a dream that I knew it all.

Today is my new name’s birthday.

Sally Kuzma's avatar

"When I was younger, I was younger..." - I do like how sneakily the word younger takes on other colors when repeated like that!

Michael McCarthy's avatar

Love this, Jae. I was particularly moved with the lines:

“and I don’t need a chocolate cake. Although yesterday I craved sweet words.”

Tomás Ó Ruairc's avatar

Love this! What a great opening line - today is my new name’s birthday!

Emily Elliot's avatar

Whether it is a made thing or a real day, happy birthday. 🎈

Jae J Casella's avatar

See you soon, friend!!

Nancy R Heisey's avatar

"Although yesterday I craved sweet words"!!

Nicola Grove's avatar

lovely especially the link between cake and leaving things behind

Lisa Marie Simmons's avatar

Jae, I’ll be returning to this one; there are a lot of layers here. Wonderful writing as ever!

Deacon Joanne's avatar

Really powerful, "when I was younger, I was younger". I enjoy the resistance in that!!

Wendy Paterson's avatar

A still and quiet Sunday

I begin the day in pain

Yesterday, I could run

I hear the tattooed man

I begin the day in pain

I believed I could be loved

I hear the tattooed man

I would never be loved

I believed I could be loved

I make my peace

I would never be loved

I had a dream of you

I make my peace

Yesterday, I could run

I had a dream of you

A still and quiet Sunday

Beth Cross's avatar

I feel the ache of this one.

Wendy Paterson's avatar

I didn’t even realise how much it hurt until the last line hit…

liz kohlenberg's avatar

I love this, Wendy! The tattooed man reminded me of "the little lame balloon man whistles far and wee" which is a good echo here.

I also love "yesterday I could run."

Wendy Paterson's avatar

Thank you. I used to be able to run miles from my apartment to university, just for the sheer joy of it. Now I have to walk with two sticks. I really, really miss being able to run. I guess there is also a very relevant second meaning if you equate the word run with the word escape.

Nicola Grove's avatar

this tells me of the way we go round and round, and come to peace but yet the doubts come again. thank you for this honest reflection.. as an arthritis sufferer I feel it - yesterday I could run...

Wendy Paterson's avatar

wishing you as many low pain days as possible.

PAT's avatar

Lovely way to share that pain of body and soul. And still peace amid dreams and a still quiet Sunday. Lovely!!!!!

Wendy Paterson's avatar

thank you very much.

Chantal Travers - Writual's avatar

Oooh and with that last line. Love!!!!

Anne Pender's avatar

Fab, Wendy!! Especially "I had a dream of you / I make my peace..."

Wendy Paterson's avatar

Yes, I love the way that the pantoum reveals unexpected or hidden things. It’s like the tarot of verse forms.

Anne Pender's avatar

OMG, that was so much fun!!! Here goes...

...

Today, it is delicious, the longing,

and I write that feeling into the page

although yesterday I held it in, unwilling to share it with unhearing ears.

As I write, I let it fill my body, remembering,

and I write that feeling into the page.

When I was younger, I was afraid the vibrating longing would break me and

as I write, I let it fill my body, remembering

I couldn’t have known that the feeling is the seed that feeds the reality.

When I was younger, I was afraid the vibrating longing would break me and -

and anyway, nothing worth existing comes into existence without that longing.

I couldn’t have known that the feeling is the seed that feeds the reality -

I had a dream that the longing was light and I was light with that longing

and anyway nothing worth existing comes into existence without that longing,

although yesterday I held it in, unwilling to share with unhearing ears.

I had a dream that the longing was light and I was light with that longing;

today, it is delicious, the longing.

Lisa Marie Simmons's avatar

Anne!! This is such a delight to read; there is much to love. You never fail to "write that feeling into the page".

Anne Pender's avatar

You are so kind, Lisa Marie!!!

Nicola Grove's avatar

I think it is really skilled the way this comes together and progresses the thinking through the patterned repetition...so well done

Anne Pender's avatar

Thank you, Nicola!

Lynn Sanford's avatar

I share this brilliant light along with the longing

Richard Fair's avatar

And today isn’t my birthday,

so I didn’t get any presents.

Yesterday I did get some cheese.

I can still smell it.

So I didn’t get any presents.

I loved cheese when I was little,

I can still smell it.

Who knew how delicious it would be.

I loved cheese when I was little.

If a tad unhealthy,

Who knew how delicious it would be.

But it gives me nightmares

If a tad unhealthy,

Yesterday I did get some cheese.

But it gives me nightmares,

And today isn’t my birthday.

Julien Lesage's avatar

I really like this one, even though it's a bit cheesy

Deacon Joanne's avatar

An ode to cheese. I love it!

Nicola Grove's avatar

you will have to get yourself a present of some different cheese.... that doesn't give you nightmares... I love Doux de Montagne myself... when it is your birthday I do hope you DO get presents..

Richard Fair's avatar

Not tried that cheese. I’m guessing French and soft? I had my birthday three weeks ago and got a small selection of haiku books.

Éloïse's avatar

Love this one. So fun

Jo Mosser's avatar

today is another word for passage

and I will move through it

although yesterday was beautiful

as i write, I still don't know the half of it

and I will move through it

when i was younger i was afraid

as i write, I still don't know the half of it

i couldn't have known who to follow

when i was younger i was afraid

and anyway it's right to feel fear sometimes

i couldn't have known who to follow

I had a dream that I was the dawn

and anyway it's right to feel fear sometimes

although yesterday was beautiful

I had a dream that I was the dawn

today is another word for passage

PAT's avatar

I love the line "today is another word for passage".

Anne Pender's avatar

"I had a dream that I was the dawn..." - so beautiful, Jo!

Karen Ehrens's avatar

Agree! My favorite line: "I had a dream that I was the dawn"

Michael T Smith's avatar

I had a dream that I was the dawn….wow!

Nicola Grove's avatar

a wonderful poem for anxiety

Beth Cross's avatar

Love this, so beautiful, what a dream!

Lisa Marie Simmons's avatar

What a compelling starting/finishing line. Jo, I am, as ever, such a fan.

Gina's avatar

Today it is my wedding day

And I feel relief

Although yesterday I struggled to be alone

As I write, I connect to myself

And I feel relief

When I was younger I sought solitude

As I write, I connect to myself

I couldn't have known how I sought my own despair

When I was younger I sought solitude

And anyway I looked for love

I couldn't have known how I sought my own despair

I had a dream I was forgiven

And anyway I looked for love

Although yesterday I struggled to be alone

I had a dream I was forgiven

Today is my wedding day

PAT's avatar

forgiveness of self or others is so very personal and intense. As needed, please make it reality.

Deacon Joanne's avatar

The whole framing of this as your wedding day raises such interesting possibilities. In some way, is every day a wedding day? A bringing together of things in a way never to be repeated?

Lyn Taylor Hale's avatar

PANTOUM DAYS ARE MY FAVORITES!! I love the play of it. Although, I think I might entitle this one, "A random journal entry".

Today is the Lord's day.

and I have plans to go swimming with my friends,

although yesterday, I sat with my aging father.

As I write, morning is trying to arrive

and I have plans to go to the lake with my friends.

When I was younger, I thought I might be famous.

As I write, morning is coming.

I couldn't have known how scared I was.

Younger me thought I might be famous,

and fame might have ruined everything.

I couldn't have known how scared I was, but

I did have a dream my life would matter.

Fame might have ruined everything,

although yesterday, I sat with my aging father.

I had a dream my life would matter.

Today is the Lord's day.

Nicola Grove's avatar

so many of these poems are about fear.. very reassuring,, thank you

Deacon Joanne's avatar

This one really flows. And I identify so much with the line "When I was younger, I thought I might be famous" then later "and fame might have ruined everything" So wise.

Jo Mosser's avatar

ahhhhh i love this one

Jen G's avatar
2dEdited

Today, it is nine days from the last day of my 27th year of teaching

and I have a large stack of papers to grade and a mountain of issues to resolve

although yesterday I took a day of rest to sit under a tree

As I write, I think about the new lives I've become familiar with, responsible for, attached to

and I have a large stack of papers to grade and a mountain of issues to resolve

When I was younger I wanted to be a lawyer, of all things

As I write, I think about the new lives I've become familiar with, responsible for, attached to

I couldn’t have known I would have hundreds of children, not just one

When I was younger I didn't understand the concept of wanting to be

and anyway, with the days of this latest ride coming to an end

I couldn’t have known I would have hundreds of children, not just one

I had a dream that I could take a deep deep breath

and anyway, with the days of this latest ride coming to an end

although yesterday I took a day of rest to sit under a tree

I had a dream that I could take a deep deep breath

Today, it is nine days from the last day of my 27th year of teaching

Rebecca Stultz's avatar

So true for for so many teachers and former teachers, including me. You've captured both the reality of a teacher's load and the joy of having "hundreds of children."

May your last nine days be ones where can you breathe even though your teacher life is ending.

Jen G's avatar

Just ending for the summer. I have a ways to go… :)

odette petrini's avatar

I felt such resonance with your poem -being a recently retired teacher myself.

Jen G's avatar

I hope you are taking many deep deep breaths

odette petrini's avatar

I have been!! Life is good!

Karen Ehrens's avatar

Today I’ll walk in the woods and hear Cardinal calls

I’ll have to tilt my head back so far to see the sky

Although yesterday I couldn’t even find the moon

As I write, I see my shoes smudged with clay dirt

I’ll have to tilt my head back so far to see the sky

When I was younger I lived where the sky filled our eyes and the Meadowlark lilted

As I write, I see my shoes smudged with clay dirt

I couldn’t have known those in charge didn’t care about Meadowlarks

When I was younger I lived where the sky filled our eyes and the Meadowlark lilted

And anyway, isn’t it about time for a new state bird?

I couldn’t have known those in charge didn’t care about Meadowlarks

I dreamed in horizontal

And anyway, isn’t it about time for a new state bird?

Although yesterday I couldn’t even find the moon

I dreamed in horizontal

Today I’ll walk in the woods and hear Cardinal calls

Deacon Joanne's avatar

My late husband, the birder, would have loved this. I love it myself.

Julie Robarts's avatar

Today, it is grey, windy, dull

and I see the roads pass quickly

although yesterday I delighted in the journey

As I write, I feel only the fatigue

and I see the roads pass quickly

When I was younger I wanted to see everything

As I write, I feel only the fatigue

I couldn’t have known how difference was within

When I was younger I wanted to see everything

and anyway there isn't time to see it all

I couldn’t have known how difference was within

I had a dream that colour, life, gathered 'round

and anyway there isn't time to see it all

although yesterday I delighted in the journey

I had a dream that colour, life, gathered 'round

Today, it is grey, windy, dull

Deacon Joanne's avatar

Great line, "As I write, I feel only the fatigue". I was leaning towards something like that myself, but you've captured it more crisply. Thank you.

Beth Cross's avatar

I had these thoughts as well as I wondered what to write, thank you for shaping them so well

Julie Robarts's avatar

thank you, I am new to this special community and way of sharing experience

Jenny B Clark's avatar

Pantoum About Time

Today it is three hundred fifteen days post surgery.

I still endure pain and edema whatever I do.

Although yesterday compassion and forgiveness entered my heart,

as I write it’s anger and fear and grief that flood my body.

I still endure pain and edema whatever I do.

When I was younger I learned not to trust what I felt.

As I write it’s anger and fear and grief that flood my body.

I couldn’t have know the damage that comes from neglect.

When I was younger I learned not to trust what I felt.

Life had lessons of suffering to teach me.

I couldn’t have known the damage that comes from neglect.

In my dream a thousand blue iris have blossomed overnight.

Life had lessons of suffering to teach me

although yesterday compassion and forgiveness entered my heart.

In my dream a thousand blue iris have blossomed overnight.

Today it is three hundred fifteen days post surgery.

Nicola Grove's avatar

Please stay with the irises, which bloom like hope out of your pain

Deacon Joanne's avatar

your pantoum works so well, as a poem and letting us into your life. Those blue iris in your dream are (to mix metaphors) a ray of sunshine. May you heal well.

Jennifer Revill's avatar

Bless you as you navigate the great wisdom of your body, and of the irises, and of yourself.

Mary Anker's avatar

We both used "damage" in line 6 and wrote about flowers

and learning....

thanks for the simpatico

Nicola Grove's avatar

Today it is hot enough to bake a loaf of bread on rock

And I am thinking about thirst in Gaza

Although yesterday I tried to look at peonies

As I write, each word is a small and silent prayer

And I am thinking about thirst in Gaza

When I was younger I went to the Holy Land

As I write each word is a small and silent prayer

I couldn’t have known it would be razed and wired

When I was younger I went to the Holy Land

And anyway what can I do but witness

I should have known it would be razed and wired

I had a dream that stones were bread, and tears were water

And anyway what I can do is witness

Although yesterday I tried to look at peonies

I had a dream that stones were bread, and tears were water

Today it is hot enough to bake a loaf of bread on rock

Deacon Joanne's avatar

Really powerful. Great use of the pantoum to make an important witness.

Jae J Casella's avatar

Love the opening line…

liz kohlenberg's avatar

wonderful!

"And anyway what can I do but witness"

yes.

Maria Basile's avatar

Today, it is Pentecost

And I will wear red

Although yesterday it rained all day

As I write, I lean to open a window

And I will wear red

When I was younger, I felt bad for my Mom

As I write, I lean to open a window

I couldn't have known I'd become her

When I was younger, I felt bad for my Mom

And anyway, I married my Dad

I couldn't have known I'd become her

I had a dream we solved problems together

And anyway, I married my Dad

Although yesterday, it rained all day

I had a dream we'd solve problems together

Today, it is Pentecost.

Rebecca Stultz's avatar

This evokes so many questions and juxtaposes what is with what is desired, both of which I love for poems to do. Well done, Maria.

Beth Cross's avatar

You say such powerful things so well!

Mona Chopra's avatar

Today it is 100 days since my dad — I do not like the word

And I am sadder than I knew sad could be

Although yesterday I was laughing with children, singing happy birthday

As I write I listen to the rain, wonder what is next.

And I am sadder than I knew sad could be

When I was younger, I asked my dad anything I did not know

As I write I listen to the rain, wonder what is next

I couldn’t have known how death would come.

When I was younger, I asked my dad anything I did not know

And anyway, not knowing is at times a gift

I couldn’t have known how death would come

I had a dream that my mom visited, made the bed, and hugged me.

Is not knowing at times a gift?

Although yesterday I was laughing with children, singing happy birthday

I had a dream that my mom visited, made the final bed my dad lay on, and hugged me

Today it is 100 days since my dad — I do not like the word.

Jenny Noble Anderson's avatar

This is beautiful, Mona. I'm holding you in my thoughts.

Mona Chopra's avatar

Ohh, thank you thank you dear Jenny Noble Anderson :-) ❤️‍🩹💞🙏🏾

Patty McGrath's avatar

Maya - my condolences. It is a great loss to be robbed of a Dad who is a true mentor. My Dad had a real sense of values and high standards for himself and all the others in his community engagements. As his first-born I think I had more access to his reflections. And - I do not like the word either - and 100 days times 10, or times a thousand - no one else can fill that role.

Mona Chopra's avatar

Thank you so much, Patty ❤️‍🩹🙏🏾.